God has a sense of humour

Yesterday I was unwell, but still able to participate in worship. It was great the way the leaders gathered around me - any part of the service that I had written a full text for was handed out (including the Eucharist - having accredited lay presidents in the your congregations is a real benefit). Basically I was just asked to do the children's address and sermon.

At the first service, there was a concern about me having to drive between congregations, so I preached from a chair and microphone out the front of the pulpit. I was more dependent than ever on the list of dot points that I use as my prompts, but I felt like I had wandered everywhere. At the end of the sermon I commented that it probably wasn't the most coherent of sermons, but I heard one of the congregation mutter under her breath "Wow, that was really powerful." Really powerful? I must admit to a moment of outrage. I could not have felt less powerful. My body had let me down (I know, I had let my body down first) and I was unable to enjoy the full scope of my vocation, I was sitting down as I was too weak, and felt like I was having to suck ideas through a straw. Yet God still uses this to great effect. If I ever take my contribution too seriously, I need to remember this moment.

At the second service, I was a lot more relaxed about taking a seat for a service I had written, and I relaxed and enjoyed the liturgy as I would if I was attending a service someone else had written. This, in itself, is a good reality check for a liturgist as it lets you see if the movements of worship work the way you envision them. Then I found myself noticing features that I had not even planned, particularly in the Eucharist section where lay presiders (like myself) are limited to using approved resources. I was able to make connections as to why some of my instinctive (or spirit-led) selections were so appealing to me at the time of selection. I came out of that service with a great deal of energy.

So, once again God acts through my frailty. Why should I be surprised?